So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
