why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
