the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
