No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Duck Duck Cougar?
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
