You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Send help, water and tortillas.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
