Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
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