Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Randomize
