i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
