Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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