I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
