I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
