a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize