3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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