oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
He felt like a one man threesome
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize