Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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