I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
