belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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