I think i peed on brittanys purse
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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