I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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