Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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