...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
