I wish I could punch you in the face.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize