Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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