You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
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