You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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