This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
