Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
