I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Randomize
