are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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