I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
