Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
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She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
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Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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