Welp...herpes.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
