i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
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