I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
