Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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