New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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