You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
