maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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