She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
