she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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