she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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