Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Randomize
