It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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