We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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