If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize