Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
