You just made me feel so damn special
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
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