last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
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