And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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