if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
there is glitter all over my balls
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
