I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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