Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
